Would you like to know why kids can’t just play with other kids?

Other children won’t set aside their personal wants, wishes, and frustrations to help your child work through the stresses of his life in play.

As an adult, you can set aside your agenda for 20-30 minutes a week. You can let your child be the good guy when he needs to defeat a bad guy. You can stick with it until he reaches the answer he’s needing. You can pretend to die on command and come back to life as many times as necessary for him to get the sense of release he's seeking.

Other kids won’t do this for your child. They have their own needs. They’ll push their own agendas. And if they don't, they should. It really wouldn't be healthy if they didn't. Learning to cooperate in play with others is a valuable experience and meets an important developmental need. Both experiences are important. They're just different.

Sometimes a child needs to throw up impossible circumstances that can’t be defeated. They’re working out a way to cope with frustration. When she can direct your participation in her play, she can safely explore her emotions instead of expressing those feelings as tears and tantrums. That makes for a better week after the play time.

When kids play, they’re figuring out important things they need to know, things that bother them. When your child communicates with you through play, you get to see things that are on his mind and the how he makes sense of his world. You have a window into her soul. You can make a difference in her life at the very time she needs you. You can go to bed knowing you were there for them.